Open your Bible and read Matthew 23:1-12, 23-28
“For you are like whitewashed tombs, which outwardly appear beautiful, but within are full of dead people's bones and all uncleanness.”
Matthew 23:27 · ESVMaybe a church took your money. Maybe a leader covered something up. Maybe it was smaller and quieter and it still made you never want to walk back in.
Read what Jesus says to religious professionals. It is harsher than anything you have said about them. Beautiful outside, bones inside. He was not mildly disappointed with spiritual abuse. He was furious about it.
That does not undo what happened to you, and it should not. Damage done in his name is real damage, and the fact that he hated it does not make it hurt less.
But it does mean something for your question. If the man himself is the loudest critic of the people who hurt you, then judging him by them is the one comparison that will not hold. You are allowed to be done with an institution and still not be done asking about him.
Do this today
Name the person whose religion hurt you. You do not have to forgive them today.
An honest thing to say to God
“I will not decide about him based on people who used his name badly.”